1 Corinthians 7:38 Meaning: When 'Better' Does Not Mean 'Holier'
So then both he who gives his own virgin in marriage does well, and he who doesn’t give her in marriage does better.
So then he that giveth her in marriage doeth well; but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth better.
So then both he that giveth his own virgin daughter in marriage doeth well; and he that giveth her not in marriage shall do better.
so that both he who is giving in marriage doth well, and he who is not giving in marriage doth better.
So that he that marries himself does well; and he that does not marry does better.
Meaning in one sentence
Paul says both marrying and staying single are good, but one is better for undivided devotion to the Lord, not as morally superior, but as
Context
Paul is answering questions the Corinthian church sent him about marriage. He has already covered marriage for the married, widows, and those with unbelieving spouses. Now he speaks about fathers deciding whether to give their daughters in marriage. A time of social pressure and persecution, which Paul calls the 'present distress,' is pressing in. He wants believers to be free to serve the Lord without extra burdens. So he tells parents that if they marry off their daughter, they do well. If they keep her unmarried, they do better, not because marriage is wrong, but because singleness, in that moment, allows fuller attention to God.
Key Words
The Greek verb behind 'gives in marriage' (gamizōn) points to the father or guardian as the one making the decision. This is not a general statement about celibacy versus marriage for every person; it is advice for a parent in a particular cultural and crisis setting. The word for 'well' (kalōs) means commendable, right, without blame. Paul is clear: marrying a daughter is a good act, nothing wrong with it. The word for 'better' (kreisson) is a comparative, it compares two goods. It does not mean 'holier' or 'more righteous.' It means more advantageous for the circumstances: more freedom to serve the Lord without the cares that come with family life (v.34). Paul is not ranking the spiritual value of two states; he is giving practical counsel for undistracted devotion.
How Christians Read This Verse
Calvin writes that Paul only prefers celibacy under the condition that the daughter has power to abstain, otherwise the father acts cruelly to keep her from marriage. Matthew Henry sees the passage as advice about guiding daughters in a culture where remaining unmarried could hurt a woman's reputation. Barnes says Paul declares the one who does not marry his daughter 'does that which is on the whole to be preferred, if it can be done.' Gill adds that the 'better' is not in itself, but considers the advantage for enduring persecution and serving God. All these commentators agree: marriage is good, and singleness is better only in a relative, practical sense, never as a higher spiritual state.
A common misunderstanding
Some read this verse and conclude Paul teaches that staying single makes you a better Christian than getting married. In fact, Paul just finished saying 'he who gives his own virgin in marriage does well.' That word 'well' means it is a good, blameless choice. The 'better' is about freedom from distraction during hard times, not about moral worth. Paul honors marriage elsewhere (Hebrews 13:4) and never calls it second-class.
Living This Out
This week, you might be deciding about a relationship, or helping a child think about their future. Let Paul free you from the pressure to make the 'better' choice as if one path is holier. Ask instead: What helps me attend to the Lord without distraction right now? Maybe that is marriage, with its own cares and joys. Maybe it is singleness, with its freedom. Both are good. Honoring God in the place you are, that is what truly matters.
Main takeaway: Marriage and singleness are both honorable before God; Paul only calls singleness better because it offers freedom to serve the Lord without distraction.
For Families
For ages 5, 8
Paul said it's okay to get married, and it's okay to stay single. Both are good. What matters most is loving Jesus with your whole heart.
For ages 9, 12
Some Christians in Paul's time thought it might be better to stay single so they could focus completely on God without family worries. Paul said marriage is a good thing too, it's not wrong. The most important thing is to love and serve God with your whole heart, whether you are married or single someday.
Questions People Ask
Who is 'his own virgin' in this verse?
The phrase refers to a father's unmarried daughter. In the culture of the time, parents arranged marriages for their children. Paul addresses fathers who were wondering whether to have their daughters marry or let them remain single to serve the Lord.
Does Paul think it is a sin to get married?
Not at all. He says the father who gives his daughter in marriage 'does well', the Greek word kalōs means something commendable and right. Marriage is good. The 'better' is only a comparison under the specific circumstances of persecution and a desire for undivided devotion to God.
Should I feel pressured to stay single because it is 'better'?
Only if you have the gift of self-control and a genuine desire to serve God without the cares of family (v.9, v.37). Paul does not command singleness. He gives freedom: both options are good. The 'better' is personal and situational, not a universal rule.
For pastors & researchers
Greek interlinear, 8 commentaries & word study