Genesis 26:35 Meaning: Why Esau's Wives Grieved Isaac & Rebekah
They grieved Isaac’s and Rebekah’s spirits.
Which were a grief of mind unto Isaac and to Rebekah.
and they were a grief of mind unto Isaac and to Rebekah.
and they are a bitterness of spirit to Isaac and to Rebekah.
And they were a grief of mind to Isaac and to Rebecca.
Meaning in one sentence
Genesis 26:35 describes the deep grief Esau's marriages to Hittite women caused his parents. Discover why this choice brought such bitterness of spirit.
Context
This short verse closes a chapter full of blessings and conflicts. Isaac had just made peace with the Philistines and found water at Beersheba. Then the writer turns to Esau. At forty years old, he took two wives from the Hittites, a people living in Canaan. The text says these women grieved Isaac’s and Rebekah’s spirits. This was not a small disappointment. It was a deep, ongoing bitterness that colored the home. Their son had chosen wives outside the community of faith, ignoring what Abraham had carefully guarded. This grief sets the stage for the blessing and deception that follow in chapter 27.
Key Words
The Hebrew behind this verse is raw and physical. The word translated grieved or bitterness is môrat, from a root meaning to be sharp or bitter. It is the same kind of bitterness that describes a heart’s most private pain. Then rûach appears, spirit, breath, the animating core of a person. So Isaac and Rebekah experienced a bitterness that reached into their spirit, the place of hope and vitality. The verb form (they were) shows it was not a one-time event but an enduring state. Each day, these marriages reminded them of a son who had turned away from the covenant. This is grief that settles in and changes the air of a home.
How Christians Read This Verse
Christians across traditions agree that this grief was tied to faith and covenant. Anglican commentators (Cambridge Bible) see it as a soreness and disappointment over a mixed marriage that dishonored the family’s calling. Reformed writers like Matthew Henry and Gill emphasize Esau’s disregard for Abraham’s instructions and the women’s idolatry. Methodist scholar Adam Clarke notes that the women themselves were likely rebellious and proud. All recognize that Esau’s choice was not just a family disagreement, it was a spiritual turning point. The parents grieved because their son had aligned himself with people who did not share the promise.
A common misunderstanding
Living This Out
If you are a parent who has watched a grown child make choices that break your heart, this verse names that exact pain. Isaac and Rebekah did not pretend everything was fine. They let the grief stand. You do not need to hide your sorrow from God. He sees the bitterness that has lodged in your spirit. This week, you might set aside time to speak that specific grief to Him: the disappointment, the fear, the sense of loss. You are not alone in it. And as the rest of Genesis shows, God’s story did not end with Esau’s bad choices. He is still at work in ways you cannot yet see.
Main takeaway: A child’s rejection of the faith can bring a deep bitterness to a parent’s spirit, but God remains present in the grief.
For Families
For ages 5, 8
Esau married women who made his mom and dad very sad. The women did not love God like Abraham taught. It hurt Isaac and Rebekah’s hearts.
For ages 9, 12
When Esau chose wives from the Canaanites, he was turning away from the faith of his family. The Bible says this grief was like bitterness in Isaac and Rebekah’s spirits. Your choices affect the people who love you, especially when you walk away from what you have been taught. But even when someone makes a wrong choice, God does not give up on the family story.
Questions People Ask
Why did Esau marry Hittite women?
The Bible does not give Esau’s reasons. He was forty years old and simply took these wives from among the Canaanites, the Hittites were a local tribe. It seems he followed his own desires rather than seeking a wife from his mother’s family, as Abraham had done. The text implies this was a willful choice against his parents’ wishes.
What does 'grief of mind' or 'bitterness of spirit' mean in Hebrew?
The Hebrew phrase is 'môrat rûach.' Môrat means bitterness, from a root meaning sharp or bitter. Rûach means spirit, breath, or wind. Together they describe a deep, ongoing pain that affects a person’s inner life. It is not a passing sadness but a settled sorrow that changes how you feel and hope.
Was Esau’s marriage the reason he was later rejected as heir?
Christians see it as one sign of Esau’s disregard for spiritual blessings. The writer of Hebrews calls him 'profane' for selling his birthright. Marrying Canaanite women showed he did not value the covenant God made with Abraham. His parents’ grief reflected that deeper rejection. The New Testament uses Esau as an example of someone who treated holy things lightly.
Did Isaac and Rebekah try to stop the marriage?
The text does not say they tried to intervene. It only records their grief. Later, in Genesis 27:46, Rebekah expresses her weariness with the Hittite women and urges Isaac to send Jacob away for a wife from her family. So the grief led to action to prevent Jacob from repeating Esau’s mistake.
How does this verse connect to the rest of Genesis?
This verse explains the family tension that leads to Jacob stealing the blessing. Isaac and Rebekah’s grief over Esau’s marriages sets the stage for Rebekah’s plan to help Jacob. It also highlights the contrast between Esau, who cared little for the covenant, and Jacob, who would be shaped by it.
For pastors & researchers
Hebrew interlinear, 8 commentaries & word study